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NERD CAMP UPDATE: WANYE GOES TO FACEBOOK

Wanye
By Wanye
11 years ago
This second nerd camp update is about successful youth: Mini Daddy – featured above – and Mark Zuckerberg as you will see shortly. It is NOT about your local squadon’s efficient penalty killing or the fact that Shea Weber is now richer than Zuckerberg and Mini Daddy combined. You have been warned before making the jump.
Few things are as impressive of laying eyes on a really successful person who has made their own way in life. They know who they are, you know who they are and there ain’t no getting around the fact that while most of us sit around wishing we were doing something awesome and eating delicious donairs they have gone and done it. 
Mini Daddy knows he is doing it big. With tracks this catchy he is surely destined to a fistful of Grammy Awards and an Olympic swimming pool full of gold bullion before his days are done. Loosely translated the chorus of his title jam – enjoyed by all of our Mexican colleagues down here at nerd camp – means "I am the cutest kid, I am the sexiest kid and I can make you dance."
You sure can. Bueno para perrear el mini daddy!

VISITING FACEBOOK

Speaking of people who know they are doing it b-i-g, we had the opportunity to go meet with Facebook yesterday down here in the Sunshine State. (note: that may be Florida we can’t recall) In any event their newly renovated campus was off the chain. Free food, free Oil changes in the parking lot and a bunch of really really successful cats walking around the offices pretending not to care about what they are worth since the Facebook IPO.
Somehow or other we got to go meet with some of the people responsible for creating the greatest time waster at work since minesweeper. We got to eat their free cupcakes and drink their free beer and pump them for information about how they think the world will look in 5 years if they get their way – which they will.
This is one of the sickest companies ever devised. They know it, their 900 million users know it, we know it and hell even Mini Daddy probably knows it.

GAME TIME

 
As we walked around the campus we saw none other than the Head Honcho himself Mark Zuckerberg, having a meeting in a conference room. Apparently he is quite visible at the company, eating lunch in one of their many cafeterias on the reg and everyone we asked said he is actually a really cool dude despite what the media and feature films suggest.
Being worth a cool 14.1 billion dollars might to that to a fella.
Anywhoo, we see Zuckerberg mere feet away as we walked past and had our tiny mind shattered into dust. "No one is going to believe you saw him Wanye. You need to go and get proof" it suggested. So as the rest of the camp made it’s way into the next meeting we doubled back and boldly took a picture of The Man as he kicked back and plotted the launch of Skynet or some such thing.
Immediately a security guard came running at us top speed. "Who are you? What are you doing? Do you work here at Facebook?" Now this guy was doing his job – and most attentively we might add – so we had to throw up the 100 foot wall of stupidity like only your ol’ pal Wanye can.
"Yeah I work here. So what?"
"Where is your ID card? What is your name? You know you aren’t allowed to take pictures here."
"I wasn’t taking a picture. What are you talking about?"
And so it went for a few tense seconds. Seeing we weren’t about to outwit the guy we made a snap decision and just took off running. In a beeline. Past the main doors which have enough security to qualify as an International Airport. And we didn’t look back to give the guy another look at our picture taking face.
Are we banned for life from the Facebook campus? Probably. But It was worth it. That’s totally Zuckerberg.

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