The 2016 Jets Nation Awards!

Welcome
everybody to the 2016 Jets Nation awards where we honor the best from this past
2015-16 Winnipeg Jets season! I am your host Art and tonight for our musical
guest, we had briefly thought about bringing in one of the hottest rock or pop
acts that all the kids like, but in sticking with the tried and true NHL
tradition we settled on bringing in a vaguely familiar rock act from the early
2000’s that did that one song you kind of liked but that doesn’t remind you at
all about the sport of hockey, so without further ado, here are.. Unwritten
Law!

Fantastic!
Now we’re in the mood for hockey!

Our first
award of the night is the “Are You Sure You Didn’t Walk Off The Set Of The TV
Show ‘ Vikings’?” Award
and it goes to… Wait, we have a tie! Ladies and
gentlemen your co-winners are Mathieu Perreault and Chris Thorburn! Both of
told me over the phone that they would have liked to have been here to accept
but that they were preparing to lead a pillage of North Bay this weekend and
then sounded off a blast from a rather loud horn before hanging up.

Next we
have the “Is it too early to give him an award yet?” award and our winner here
is Patrik Laine! From what I understand we can’t *legally* give him this
award for another 48 hours or so when his name will no doubt be called by the Jets as the 2nd overall pick in the 2016 draft. Until then we’ll hand this award
over to GM Kevin Cheveldayoff for safe keeping and to hand it to the Jets draft
pick in Buffalo…

What’s that
Chevy? No, this isn’t for Jesse Puljujarvi, it’s for Laine. Yes, we’re sure.
That’s who we want.. err.. I mean that you better be picking.. I mean that is who this is for. Yes, we know Puljujarvi is a fine talent as well and we’re sure some Blue Jackets blog will give him a made up fake award for him too, but Laine is our guy so you need to give this to
him when you in fact pick him 2nd overall. Yes, we understand that
maybe we’ve all bought in to the Laine hype that has cranked up over the last
month, but this just feels right and is the easiest thing you’ll do all year.
No one is going to question you and… Good grief Chevy will you stop talking about Puljujarvi?! Just give this to Patrik WHEN YOU DRAFT HIM, ok!?

The “Bob
Essensa Memorial Trophy”
goes to the goalie whom all Jets fans will pin their
future hopes and dreams upon based on the relatively small sample size of one
season where he played really well and this year the winner is Connor Hellebuyck! Hellebuyck almost single-handedly dragged the Jets into
respectability and arguably kept them in playoff contention longer than most of
us assumed would be the case. Now with the signing of Hutchinson to a two year deal, and with seemingly no real interest from anyone in taking Pavelec off the Jets hands, we are anxious to see how Jets
management limbos and contorts their way into the argument that you still need
work in the AHL after a strong season filling in for Pavelec and what we assume
will be just as strong a showing in the one game you get at the World Cup
filling in for Matt Murray on Team North America.

The yearly
“You Got Byfulien’ed And Somehow You’re Still Alive” award is quietly presented
to Ottawa Senators forward Mark Stone who told me backstage that the the little birds he saw right after that hit stopped
flying around his head two weeks ago last Tuesday! This award is brought to you
by Advil who will give Mr. Stone a year’s supply of… No, Mark I said “Advil”
not “Anvil” which is what you most resembled on the hit. Anyway lets take a look at this massive hit one (or fifty) more
times!


The “Heart
And Grit With Extra Gritty Heart” Award
as voted on by the Winnipeg Media and
fans who ‘wooo’ after the True North shout during the anthem. For the fifth year in a row the award
goes to Mark Stuart! People can – and certainly already do – question a lot
about what you bring to the ice in terms of talent and production but in the
end we all know that none of that matters why you try really hard and you’re a
good guy in the locker room.

This year
the trophy is in the shape of a large anchor. Mark, if you’re not sure how to
handle it, we suggest talking to Jacob Trouba who gained a lot of experience
this past season carrying one.

The “Wish
Upon A Star” Award
goes to the player who most fans had impossibly high hopes for going into the season. Your nominees are Nik Ehlers, Adam Lowry and Alex Burmistrov, and your winner is… Wait, the envelope just says “NHL Draft Lottery Simulator”!

Huh.

Well that seems to be all the awards we have to hand out to.. Oh? What do you all mean “real awards”? *sigh* Fine… Since you all want the BORING awards…

Best Jets defenseman far and away this season was Dustin Byfuglien. The most underrated award would go to Bryan Little who could probably win that award every year. The most improved player award for his word during the season would go to Mark Scheifele who really stepped up his game when Little was knocked out with injury.

And your Jets MVP for the 2015-16 season is Blake Wheeler.

Now that concludes our show! We asked Unwritten Law
to come back out for a second performance, but as the left they said something about
wanting to perform for a blog that is a Cup contender AND will pay them
over six million a year.. Good luck with that guys!

See you all next year!