Jets New Year’s Resolutions

A new year is upon us. New Year means change for many of us. Many people use the coming of a new year to make resolutions to make their lives better such as losing weight, getting a new job or to save more money.

We here at Jets Nation think that some members of the Winnipeg Jets need to make some resolutions of their own. Some are for the betterment of their individual self but mostly it would be beneficial to the club. After all, we want to see the Jets succeed. Right? RIGHT? So without further adieu, here are some New Year’s resolution ideas for our beloved yet struggling hockey team.

Patrik Laine: To only score goals into the opposition net instead of his own.

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Mathieu Perreault: To stay healthy for the rest of the season.

Chris Thorburn: To fight less so I can preserve my long-term health.

Dustin Byfuglien: To hit the net on one of his booming shots from the point.

Nikolaj Ehlers: To find a more consistent scoring touch. The ability and speed are there. Now just need the finish.

Mark Scheifele: To work on his balance so he doesn’t get knocked off his feet so easily.

Connor Hellebuyck: To win the number one goalie job and become the main man between the pipes this organization desperately needs.

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Toby Enstrom: To take less penalties. 

Mark Stuart & Alexander Burmistrov: To figure out what tastes better in the press box, hot dogs or popcorn.

Bryan Little: To finally be appreciated as an excellent player by the national media.

Blake Wheeler: To continue to lead by example especially to the younger players.

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Drew Stafford: To not be such an anchor on every line he plays on.

Nic Petan: To stay with the big club where he belongs.

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Jacob Trouba: To make management realize he’s worth the big contract he’s asked and will eventually sign for in the future.

Paul Maurice: To stop juggling the lines after every bad shift and let the players develop some chemistry.

Kevin Cheveldayoff: To actually speak with some clarity and give straight answers in an interview instead of corporate double talk. Also, to acquire another left shooting defenceman because the Jets are lacking in that department. If none of those work, hope the ping-pong balls bounce his way again so that Nolan Patrick lands at his feet.

Mark Chipman: To invest every single dollar made at the Heritage Classic to make this hockey team better.

To Our Readers: A very happy and prosperous 2017 with hopefully more Jets wins.