Jets All-Moustache Team

Brett Martin
November 01 2013 02:01AM

It's that time of year again, when moustaches decorate the mid-face of more than just hipsters and ex-Mounties.  

In honour of Movember, we look back at the greatest moustaches in team history.

Jets All-MOUSTACHE TEAM

And now for the most imprtant thing I've ever written. Here's my All Time Jets With a Moustache Team. 

C - LAURIE BOSCHMAN 

Boschman averaged 2.5 penalty minutes a game, which leads many to believe it was an evil moustache under his nose. 

LW - PHIL SYKES 

Just look at that thing. It's like two half-pieces of bacon. I've never met the man, but I'm guessing he's quite friendly. 

RW - PAUL MACLEAN 

 

It's a fact that his mouth-brow has its own orbit. Currently, Paul MacLean's moustache is enjoying tremendous success as an Assistant Coach of the Ottawa Senators.

D - TIM WATTERS

That look he's giving in the bottom right of the card just isn't the same sans 'stache. If I'm GM of an All-Moustache team, that's the kind of guy I can win with. 

D - DAVE BABYCH

One of the most notorious soup strainers in NHL history. Jets Nation is lucky to have such moustaches in our History.

G - DOUG SOETART 

Why is he so tired in that picture? My guess - all the Ladies his lip rug were likely getting him were wearing him out. 

COACH - BOB MURDOCH 

He won the Jack Adams in 89/90 with a coaching style that included finely coiffed facial hair and yelling at Superman midgame.

Best Recent Jet Moustache - Zach Bogosian

Bogosian gave us the 'Zorro' look last year. He even got a Foxy Friday article dedicated to him. Me-ow.

TOP Moustache PROSPECT - ZACH REDMOND  

8 NHL games so far. 4 points. One Moustache in progress. Let's hope he avoids serious injury in development, such as an upper lip scar.

The Not Funny Part

November is more than just a time to separate the boys from the vintage pornography actors. It's also a time to reflect on the health of the men in our lives - our fathers, brothers, sons, and especially ourselves (if the label fits). 

In September we commemorated Men's Cancer Health Awareness month by practicing Nutiquette. Remember this November to practice good prostate health and see your physician. You can check out Movember's resource page for more info.

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Brett Martin is a Stand Up Comic who's been featured on the Comedy Network, SiriusXm Radio, and live everywhere across Canada. But before all that, he grew up in Winnipeg as an obsessive and completely biased Jets fan. Much to his delight, he is one once again. Twitter @brettmartinlive
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#1 Kevin McCartney
November 01 2013, 11:51AM
Trash it!
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trashes
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props

Amazing team, Brett.

I can't believe anyone plays/played hockey with some of these moustaches. They must have smelled like so many otter pelts.

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